A Charming Vacation
by evanora1
Summary: Established SwanQueen relationship. Emma and Regina are married. Regina and Cora have reconciled. Snow and David have forgiven Regina. This is the story of the Charming/Swan-Mills family's first vacation together.
1. Chapter 1

PART 1

"TWO WEEKS! ... You made reservations for TWO WEEKS?" Emma ranted, pacing back and forth across the kitchen, throwing her arms around wildly. "Regina … are you out of your mind? TWO WEEKS?!" she ranted again.

Regina sat very calmly at the table, both hands wrapped around her coffee mug, a travel brochure for the "Apple Valley Campground" on the table in front of her.

"Emma." she said evenly. "The time will fly by ... you'll have so much fun, you'll wonder where the time went." she said, trying to calm the angry woman pacing across their kitchen.

Emma was desperate. Seeing that she wasn't going to sway Regina with her ranting, she dropped herself down into the chair adjacent to Regina and reached out for her wife's hands. "Regina … honey ..." she began. "I have a confession to make … I really don't like camping … I only agreed to go because you and Henry seemed so excited about it." she explained.

"You what?!" Regina responded loudly. "Emma … I … I … How can you **NOT** like camping. That's Un-American!" she said unbelievably. "Emma, have you ever even **been** camping?" she added.

"Yeah, when I was nine years old. I went with my foster family. I hated it. My foster siblings were horrible to me. They went so far as to put a snake in my sleeping bag … okay, it was a fake snake … but to a nine year old, it looked and felt real. It was a nightmare!" Emma recalled.

Regina chuckled at the thought of her wife … the "savior" running and screaming through the campground because of a fake snake.

"Regina! It's not funny! … Will you take this seriously for a moment!" she exploded. "I was traumatized!"

Regina wasn't going to let Emma's mood get to her. "Calm down dear … you are not nine years old any more and I promise, I will not allow a snake … fake or otherwise … anywhere near you." Regina joked.

"Regina, look, a few days, I can deal with … maybe even a week, but TWO WEEKS?" she exclaimed, trying to make Regina see how unreasonable that length of time was.

Regina reached up to place one palm on Emma's cheek. "Sweetheart, don't be such a baby. You'll have fun ... just give it a chance, okay?" she said, batting seductive eyes at her wife.

Emma's eyes widened. "Regina..." she began.

Regina stood up and leaned down over the table so that their faces were within a hair's breath from each other. "Yesssss?" she asked, placing light kisses across Emma's mouth.

"I ... ah ... Regina ..." Emma stammered.

"I'm listening." Regina said as the kisses floated across Emma's chin and neck.

"Regina ..." Emma moaned. Those damned kisses were on her collar bone now!

"Hhmmmm?" came the reply.

"Oh, god … Regina … ahhh … about this camping trip?" the blonde sheriff questioned.

"Yes?" Regina answered.

"Do we get our own tent?" Emma asked.

"Oh yeah!" answered the dark haired woman.

PART 2

Shopping for the camping trip was a disaster. Seeing that they had nothing to start with, the sheer volume of purchases was too large to fit in the car with the family. Emma had to leave Regina and Henry at the mall while she ran their purchases home. She was not a 'happy camper', and they hadn't even left yet!

Emma returned to collect her family a short time later. Getting into the car, Regina spared a glance at Emma and saw the raw anger on her wife's face. When their eyes met, the words "Don't go there!" were written all over Regina's face, effectively halting any retort Emma had planned. The ride home was tense and silent. Even Henry remained quiet for the duration of the ride, sensing his parents' unease.

When they got home, Henry bolted from the car and retreated rapidly into the house and straight to his room. Following Regina into the house, Emma stopped short, almost running into brunette woman. Regina looked wide eyed at the massive mountain of camping equipment Emma had piled in the kitchen. From behind her, Emma could see Regina's shoulders start to shake. Thinking Regina was crying, she placed her hands on her wife's shoulders, ready to apologize for her mood. Suddenly, Regina sank to the floor, laughing hysterically. Emma raised her eyebrows and looked at her. Thinking the former Evil Queen had finally cracked. Soon, the infectious laughter spread and she found herself on the floor next to her wife, holding her side, which was aching with the intensity of her own laughter.

PART 3

Snow, David, Regina and Emma were all sitting around Snow's dining room table looking at the food list they had just assembled for their camping trip.

"How many of us are there?" David teased, earning him an elbow in the ribs from Snow.

"We don't want to run out of food, David." Regina exclaimed.

"Yeah, but even with Emma and Henry's appetites we wouldn't go through all **that** in two weeks!"

"HEY!" Emma said, slightly offended. After going over the list herself, she had to agreed with her father. "There's enough food on that list to feed an army for a month!"

"Okay, okay!" Regina said irritably. "Let's see what we can eliminate."

Regina picked up the pencil and started making check marks next to the items that they absolutely had to have. Emma was looking over her shoulder as she went through the list.

"You forgot to check the popcorn." Emma pointed out as Regina's pencil bypassed it. Regina went back up and checked popcorn, then continued on down the list.

"Wait ... what about the stuff you need to make those turnovers?" Emma interrupted again. Regina gave Emma a sideways glare and went back and checked off the makings for the apple turnovers.

"Don't forget … Hey!" Emma exclaimed as Regina threw the pencil and list at her.

"**You** take care of the food list Ms. Swan," Regina said, walking away from the table.

Snow came to the rescue. "All right ... give me the list." she said, grabbing it from a grateful Emma. "Let's see ... Okay … All we have to do is plan a menu for two weeks, then put together a shopping list from it." Snow said, looking around to see nods of approval from the other three adults. "Okay, give me some suggestions." she said.

"Pizza." Said David.

"Pizza? How are we going to cook pizza around a campfire, David? We need an oven for that!" Regina pointed out.

"Okay, how about … tuna noodle casserole." he suggested again.

Snow knocked on David's head with her knuckles. "Hello? Is there anyone in there? David ... no more ideas that require an oven, okay?" she said to him.

David shrugged his shoulders as if to say … "What do you want from me? ... I'm a guy!"

Regina looked at Emma. "Any ideas, dear?" she asked.

Emma looked thoughtfully at Regina for a moment then said, "I don't know ... french fries, maybe. Henry would love those!"

Regina covered her face with both hands and shook her head back and forth.

Emma just looked at her, amused at the frustrated display. Finally, Regina threw her hands out to the sides and said, "Emma, David, why don't the two of you go figure out how we're going to fit all that stuff in the cars. Snow and I will work out the menu and food list, okay? Oh, and make sure there's enough room for Henry and my mother!"

Emma and David got up from the table and gave each other a 'high five' before heading out to the cars.

Snow looked at Regina with raised eyebrows. "Somehow, I get the idea that was planned ... don't you?" she said.

Two hours later, the ladies had a comprehensive menu and food list put together. "You know, it does look like a lot of food." Regina admitted.

"Yeah, and we didn't even include the perishable stuff we'll pick up once we get there." Snow observed.

"Oh well, at least we won't go hungry!" Regina observed, folding the list up and pocketing it for that afternoon's grocery shopping. "Hey, let's go see how the packing is going," she added before the two women headed outside.

Regina stopped short, causing Snow to plow into the back of her.

There in the driveway, were David's pick-up truck and Regina's Mercedes, each piled so full of camping gear that daylight couldn't be seen from one side of the vehicle to the other. Mounted on the top of Regina's car that looked like a giant Big Mac container.

Pointing to the hamburger box on top of the car, Regina said ... "Tell me that isn't full too."

Emma smiled and replied, "Nope, that's where the food is going."

"We couldn't possibly fill that big thing up with food!" Regina exclaimed.

"A week's worth of massages says you do!" Emma challenged.

"You're on!" replied Regina.

"Hey, what about me?" David asked.

Emma and Regina both raised eyebrows to Snow.

Snow looked at them and frowned. "Oh, all right ... you're on … a week's worth of massages for you too David … but Regina and I get to do the shopping!" she said.

"Fair enough!" Emma said, winking at her father.

Three hours later, it took both Emma and David, working together, to force the cover down over the car-top carrier which was bursting with food and cooking supplies.

After latching the cover down, Emma walked over to Regina, dusting her hands off, and said, "I'll take my first massage tonight sweetheart!" Dropping a kiss on Regina's surprised face, she walked toward David chuckling and gave him another 'high five'.

PART 4

To make the eight hour ride easier on Henry (and on themselves, although they would never admit to that), the adults decided to leave at midnight on the night prior to their reservations. Being allowed to stay up until midnight was a treat the kid didn't expect, and he vowed to stay awake all night. As predicted, however, by 12:30 am, he were out cold, lulled by the motion of the car and the steady hum of tires on the pavement. Regina turned to Emma and grinned. "It worked!" she whispered, being rewarded with a smile from her wife.

Check in time at the campground was 11 am. The plan was to drive through the night, stopping at rest areas to use the facilities and refill on coffee to keep them awake. They figured they'd get there around 9:30 am … in time to find a restaurant, eat breakfast, then locate the campground by check-in time. If things went well, Henry would sleep through the drive, giving the adults some much needed peace and quiet.

Most of the driving would be on the interstate highway, which was littered with rest areas every 50 miles or so. Setting the car on cruise control made the trip easier, allowing the driver to just sit back and steer. Such was the case three hours into the trip, when David turned into a rest area, Emma right behind him. The four adults exited the vehicles and stretched. Checking on Henry and Cora who were both still sound asleep, they went in pairs into the station to retrieve coffee and snacks, while the other two stood guard over their precious cargo.

Finally, after using the facilities and stocking up on refreshments, they were once again on their way.

Not five miles later, Emma felt a sudden tug at the steering wheel and had to fight to maintain control of the car as she guided it to the breakdown lane on the highway. "What the hell?" she muttered as she turned off the ignition and climbed out of the car. It was pitch black … no streetlights, nor oncoming traffic to light the way (who else would be stupid enough to be out traveling at 3 am?).

Emma ducked down and poked her head back into the car. "Regina, is there a flashlight in the glove box?" she asked irritably.

Regina rummaged around the glove box until she found the flashlight, then handed it to Emma. Thanking god that the batteries were fresh, Emma walked around the car to see what could have caused the problem, finally finding it in the right front tire, which was flatter than a pancake at the moment. "Damn!" she muttered under her breath.

Regina rolled down the window and poked her head out. "Emma, what is it?" she asked.

"Flat tire ... Gonna have to change it," came the grumpy response.

Regina was immediately out of the car to lend a hand, following Emma around the back of the car to the trunk.

Emma reached for the hatch release and suddenly remembered that the back end of the car was jammed packed with camping gear. "Shit! Shit! Shit!" Emma stormed, stamping her foot and clenching her fists with each word.

Regina followed Emma's eyes into the back of the car and instantly realized what they would have to do to get to the spare tire, which was located under the rear cargo panel … under sleeping bags and clothes and pillows, and toys and cooking pots and tents and on, and on, and on … "Oh dear!" Regina said. Regina thought to herself, this would be so much easier if she still had her magic. But part of her redemption and punishment for past crimes against the citizens of the Enchanted Forest/Storybrooke was to have her and her mother's magic stripped from them. They were mere mortals now and would have to do this the mortal way. Damn!

Several frustrating minutes later, Regina was holding the flashlight for Emma to see while she changed the tire. Passerby's wondered in awe why there were two women broken down by the side of the road, in the dead of the night, with what appeared to be boxes and bags and general debris scattered all over the ground behind their car.

David and Snow were far enough ahead of them, that they didn't notice they had lost their shadows until several miles later. Pulling into the next rest area, they just decided to sit and wait for them to catch up. A half hour passed, then another. David tried unsuccessfully to reach to his daughter with his by cell phone but they were in an area with no signal.

"David, I'm worried, we need to go look for them." Snow said.

"Yeah, you're right. Let's go." he replied, starting the car.

Just as David reached for the stick shift, they saw the station wagon limp into the rest area, a very angry Emma, and distraught Regina in the front seat.

Pulling into the parking place beside David and Snow, the two women climbed out of the car. Regina excused herself and rushed into the building to retrieve coffee for her and Emma. Emma just leaned back against the car, crossing her legs out in front of her and her arms across her chest.

David looked at the small donut tire, then at the mess in the cargo hold of the wagon, and then at Emma. He opened his mouth to speak.

"Don't even go there!" Emma said, holding up her hand to David.

PART 5

The rest of the road trip was uneventful, save the complaints coming from the back seat as Henry and Cora began stir. Emma was riding shotgun at the moment, giving Regina her turn at the wheel while she tried to catch a few

minutes of sleep. Just as she dozed off, the first complaint came.

"Mom, I'm hungry." Henry said.

"Regina, I have to pee!" Cora announced.

Regina looked at her son and her mother through the rearview mirror. "Can you both wait for about a half hour? We're almost into town. Okay?" she asked. Henry and Cora looked at each other and then turned their gaze back to Regina with a pout of their faces.

A half hour later, Regina nudged Emma awake and told her that they had arrived. Looking at her watch, she noticed that it was almost 11 am. "Damn," she said. "Half the day is gone already." Looking around, she told Regina to find the nearest service station so that they could have the tire fixed while they ate breakfast, or rather, brunch, seeing that it was almost noon. After using the facilities and receiving assurances that the tire would be ready in an hour, they set out to find a diner.

"Oh ... this is good," Snow remarked, taking a long flavorful sip from her coffee cup. The group found a Shoney's restaurant not too far from the service station, that served a buffet brunch. Soon, the five adults and one child were all sitting around the rectangular table, enjoying a smorgasbord of breakfast and lunch foods.

Their waiter was a young, college aged man, tall, and very good looking, with dark brown hair and blue eyes. He apparently thought that since there didn't seem to be a man with Regina, that she was available to flirt with. He smiled at her, flashing deep dimples and straight, white teeth. Regina innocently smiled back, totally unaware of the flirtation that was going on. Beside Henry, she was the only one unaware of the exchange. Snow and David flashed warning glances at Emma, who was becoming more tense and angry by the minute. Snow could see the cords in her neck tighten up each time the young man approached the table or flashed Regina a smile from across the room.

Snow reached out to Emma, who was seated next to her, and placed a hand over her daughter's larger one. Emma looked at Snow, who just shook her head slightly side to side, warning her not to do anything stupid. Emma just drew her brow together in a frown and gave Snow a "what would **you** do?" look. Snow 'accidentally' dropped her napkin on the floor between her and Emma. Bending over to pick it up, she noticed that Emma didn't follow her down like she was supposed to, so she reached up and grabbed the other woman's arm, jerking her head down below the table level with her.

"Damn it, Emma. I don't want to spend our vacation visiting you in jail. If looks could kill, that boy would be dead right now … Don't you dare lay a hand on him … do you hear me?" Snow warned.

"If he undresses her one more time with his eyes, I'm going to undress **him** with my fists, Snow." Emma stated.

"Look Emma, all you have to do is make a peaceful statement," Snow said.

"A what?" Emma said, starting to feel faint with the blood rushing to her head.

"A statement ... you know ... stake your claim on Regina in front of him ... tell him to back off in a nice way." Snow explained.

"Oh, I see!" Emma said, rising back into her chair, followed by Snow.

Regina eyed her wife and mother-in-law suspiciously.

Emma reached her arm over and started rubbing Regina's back. Regina looked at the blonde haired woman through narrow eyes.

Next, Emma allowed her hand to drop onto Regina's leg, rubbing her thigh up and down under the table. Regina sat up stiffly, enjoying the sensation, but wondering what her wife was up to.

Finally, Emma's hand traveled north to the one place on Regina's body that gave her total control over the older woman. Regina gasped, drawing a knowing smile out of Snow.

Mr. Pretty Boy decided to visit the table to refill Regina's coffee cup at the exact moment that Emma's fingers slipped into the "V" between Regina's legs. "God!" Regina exclaimed, turning her face to Emma, who quickly bent over to claim her lips in a sensuous kiss.

Mr. Pretty Boy was so shocked by the display, that he overfilled Regina's coffee cup, pouring the coffee all over the table.

"Hey ... Hey! Pay attention! It's full!" Cora yelled to the waiter.

"Oh my god ... Ah ... Ah ... sorry about that!" the waiter said, red faced. Grabbing a cloth, he started cleaning up the mess on the table as Emma and Snow looked at each other, grinning ear to ear.

Finally, Regina caught on to what had happened. She reached under the table and punched Emma hard in the thigh.

"Ow! What was **that** for?" Emma asked, already knowing the answer.

"I can not believe the two of you!" Regina said to the two women. "That poor man," she said, motioning to the waiter who had run off to find a dry rag. "You did that on purpose, didn't you?" she accused.

"He asked for it." Emma said in her own defense. "Regina, he was **flirting** with you!"

"So what if he was?" Regina said.

"I seemed to recall one former mayor stepping in between me and a certain female deputy not too long ago. I had to hold you back to prevent you from scratching her eyes out!" Emma reminded her wife.

Regina had the good graces to blush while Snow and David looked at each other with raised eyebrows.

"Okay! All right! We're even," Regina said putting her napkin on the table.

"Good," Emma said. Looking around the table, she asked, "Are we all done?"

Receiving numerous nods, she and David rose to their feet to go pay the bill.

Regina met Emma at the register while David went out to join Snow, Henry and Cora. Emma noticed that their waiter was there, preparing to seat another couple. Making a show of taking Regina's hand in hers, Emma raised Regina's knuckles to her lips and kissed each one. The waiter stood watching them, his eyes filled with awe and envy. Looking over at the good looking man, Emma just winked, then led Regina out of the restaurant hand in hand.

TBC ...


	2. Chapter 2

PART 6

After collecting and installing the repaired tire on Emma's car, the group set off to find the Apple Valley Campground. With instructions from the locals, they were able to find it without too much difficulty, checking in about a hour and a half later than planned. In order to have room to stretch out, they rented two camp sites, side by side. On one site, they planned to pitch the tents, and set up a cooking/eating area. On the other site, they parked the cars, set up a ring of stones for a campfire.

It took a full three hours to unpack the cars and organize the gear. They decided to set up the eating area first, pitching the screen tent, then storing their food and cooking supplies inside. The screen tent had flaps on each side that could be rolled up to let breeze in, or down to keep out wind and rain. Next, they set up the sleeping tents.

Emma and Regina's tent was a larger version of their son's tent. Before long, they had it set up inside and out, positioned to one side of the smaller tent. They had enough room in their tent to store the suitcases (theirs, Henry's and Cora's), and extra blankets. When they had finished, Emma sat down in the middle of their sleeping bags and pulled Regina down into her lap, nuzzling her nose into her wife's neck.

"Maybe this won't be so bad." the sheriff admitted.

Regina just moaned and leaned her head back further to allow Emma better access.

Emma lowered Regina to the pillows and sensuously ran her hand over Regina's breasts. "You are so beautiful, my love" she said, squeezing the supple flesh through her shirt. Leaning in, she devoured Regina's mouth, her tongue demanding, and gaining entry. Regina sucked the organ in greedily, causing a deep moan to emit from Emma's throat.

Sounds of bickering reached the ladies' ears as Emma pulled the shirt out of Regina's waistband. Emma stopped and looked at Regina. Regina turned her face in the direction of the noise. "We'd better go see …" she suggested.

Emma dropped her head to Regina's chest and sighed through her frustration. Looking back into Regina's eyes, she said, "Tonight, my dear …"

Regina just nodded and lifted her head to kiss Emma's nose, causing the younger woman to smile. Rising to her feet, Emma helped Regina up, who took a moment to straighten her clothes before exiting the tent.

Snow and David were standing at the back of their van, tailgate open. Snow's hands were gesturing wildly as they argued back and forth. Regina and Emma walked over to them, hand in hand. "Problems?" Emma asked.

"Ask Einstein, here," Snow said, indicating David with her hand.

Emma turned to look at David. "Tent poles," he said.

"Tent poles." repeated Emma. When David remained silent, she looked around at the supplies that had been thrown haphazardly out of the van. Realization struck her. Looking back at David she said, "You have got to be kidding me. Don't tell me ... you forget them, right?"

"Right." he said, looking down at the ground and kicking the dirt around with his toe.

Emma raised her hand to her mouth to hide her grin. Seeing the look on Emma's face, Snow lost her cool. Throwing her hands in the air, she stomped around shouting. "Wonderful ... this is just wonderful! We'll be sleeping under the mosquito infested stars tonight and you think it's funny?" she ranted.

Regina wasn't liking her Snow's attitude toward her wife one bit. Reaching over to Snow, she wrapped her arm around the shoulder of the woman who was once her step daughter and said, "Calm down, Snow. There are five grown adults here, we'll think of something."

Cora put her hands on her hips and started walking around the tent, which was staked securely in the ground by all four corners, but lay crumpled in on itself for lack of structural support. Noticing that their campsite was basically surrounded by trees, Cora smiled and said, "Got some rope?" An hour later, Emma and David with Cora's instructions had tied up the four corners of the roof and the center peak into the trees by ropes. From a distance, the tent appeared to be perfect ... as it would have been with the tent poles. It looked kind of weird up close, but hey, it was functional. Once the job was done, all five adults stood in front of it and looked up. Snow was the first to start laughing. Before long, all five of them were in varying degrees of incapacity from the laughter rumbling through their bellies.

The kid chose that moment to return from exploring the campground on his bike. Noticing the odd behavior coming from the adults, he approached cautiously until he was close enough to see what they were laughing about. Henry just shook his head and rummaged through the camping gear for his fishing pole to try out the stream that ran behind their campsites.

It was nearly 6 pm when the final piece of gear was stowed away and the campsite fully organized. The rumbling in Regina's stomach reminded the campers that they hadn't eaten since lunch. Snow and Regina decided that they would take care of cooking duties if Emma and David tended the campfire and cleaned up afterward and Cora was charged with keeping Henry occupied.

An hour later, Henry and Cora returned from fishing, hands washed, and the two families were sitting contentedly around the picnic table eating hamburgers, chips and corn on the cob.

Despite a 10 hour drive that should have been 8, a flat tire, a near fatal encounter in the restaurant, and some creative rope work, they were now settled in and ready for their two-week adventure. Life was good.

PART 7

Later that evening, the two families were sitting around the campfire, making s'mores and planning activities for the next two weeks.

"Damn!" Regina exclaimed as another marshmallow fell from her stick into the fire. Cora was waiting patiently at her side, armed with a graham cracker and chocolate, ready to trap the toasted marshmallow between the scrumptious layers as soon as Regina finished with it.

"Aw Regina!" Cora complained, seeing another marshmallow go up in flames on top of the log.

"Here, let me do that." Emma said, taking the stick from Regina and spearing a new marshmallow with it. Within moments, it was perfectly toasted and sandwiched in Cora's treat.

"Thank you, Emma," Cora said.

Emma looked at her mother-in-law and smiled as Regina glared at her. "How do you **DO** that?" she asked.

Emma opened her mouth to answer, but Regina interrupted her, "Never mind, I don't want to know!"

Emma just grinned and sat back down in her lawn chair. She reached out and pulled Regina into her lap, whispering seductively in her ear, "I could toast** your** marshmallows if you want me to!"

Regina gave her a 'not in front of our son and parents' look before leaning in and whispering back, "They're half melted already. Remember your promise ... tonight!"

"How could I forget?" Emma asked, reaching up to trace Regina's jaw line with her index finger, stopping under her chin to pull the smaller woman's face down for a kiss.

Snow and David looked at each other and smiled. Snow leaned into David and took his hand in a silent promise of bedtime bliss. David lifted Snow's hand to his mouth and kissed the back of it before winking at her and then turning his attention back to the fire.

Noticing that it was nearly midnight, Regina called a halt to marshmallow roasting and ordered Henry to bed. While Regina was busy tucking him in securely inside his tent, Emma and Snow went around picking up chocolate bar wrappers and left over paper plates and napkins from their dinner and threw them into the fire, which quickly turned them to ash. While, Cora reached into the cooler, she produced two beers and handed one to David.

"I really want to thank you for your help with the tent today, Cora." David said. "I can't believe I left the poles at home. I can still see them leaning against the garage door."

Cora just chuckled. "No problem ... Hey, what's on the agenda for tomorrow?" Cora asked this last question just as Regina, Emma and Snow settled themselves back into their lawn chairs around the fire. Emma rose from her seat to get them each a beer, popping Regina's open for her before handing it over. Regina smiled at her in thanks.

"Well, I read the brochure over pretty thoroughly and by the sound of it, there's a lot to do right here, but we also might want to check out the surrounding attractions. I understand there is a giant shopping mall not too far from here." Snow explained.

"Shopping?" Regina and Cora said, perking up, her travel fatigue suddenly shed.

"Oh groan!" Emma said out loud.

"Ditto!" said David.

Regina stuck her tongue out at the pair.

Emma's eyes widened. Without thinking, she blurted out, "Keep that up and I'll put that tongue to good use!"

Snow spit her mouthful of beer out across the campfire and started choking.

David laughed and rubbed her back. "Thanks a lot. I swear Emma, you make it your mission in life to embarrass the hell out of me!" she complained.

Regina had dropped her face into her hands in embarrassment after Emma blurted out that expletive. Looking up at Snow, she said, "Don't worry, Snow, she does it to me too … all the time."

"Do what?" Emma asked. "Embarrass you, or put your tongue to good use?"

Regina smacked Emma in the arm. Emma stuck her tongue out at Regina and wiggled it around, raising her eyebrows up and down.

"Arrgghh!" Regina exclaimed. "What am I going to do with you?"

"Well … " Emma began.

"Never mind! Never mind ... forget I asked!" Regina groaned.

Emma caught David's eye and winked.

"Well, time for bed." David said. The campfire discussion had him eager to get Snow alone in their tent. Rising to his feet, he grabbed the thick stick they were using as a poker and spread out the glowing embers inside the fire ring while Emma slowly poured a half bucket of water over them. Soon, the fire was out and the campers were heading to bed.

As soon as they entered their tent, Regina turned on the flashlight and then pounced on Emma, rolling her onto the sleeping bags onto her back. Laying directly on top of the younger woman, nose to nose, she looked deep into the warm green eyes and said, "You, my dear, are a big tease. You had David so

hot, he couldn't wait to get Snow into the tent." she said.

"Well, he couldn't possibly be as hot as I am for you right now." Emma growled, pulling Regina's mouth down to hers for a toe curling kiss.

Regina returned the kiss with all the passion she could muster. Emma was so inflamed, that she tore impatiently at Regina's clothes, wanting to feel her wife's skin as fast as possible. Between the two of them, they had Regina's clothes off and thrown into the corner of the tent in record time. Locking their legs together, Emma rolled them over so that her body lay completely on top of the taller woman, trapping her in place. She began to kiss and nip at Regina's neck, causing her to writhe in agonizing desire.

"I need you, Emma … please!" Regina pleaded, roughly pulling at Emma's clothing.

Suddenly, they heard a noise outside their tent. Both women froze.

"Mom?" the voice said. "Mom, ma, I'm scared."

The sound of the zipper moving set both women into action. Emma pulled her T-shirt back over her head quickly and then helped Regina locate her own shirt and panties. By the time the zipper was totally opened, Regina had just pulled her drawers into place and the two women were laying side by side, trying to act casually. Had their intruder been anyone but a child, they would have noticed the flush on their faces and desire in their eyes. Fortunately for them (or unfortunately, as was the actual case), their visitor was Henry who was totally unaware of what he had just interrupted.

Regina sat up. "Henry, honey. What's wrong?" she asked.

"I'm scared. I can hear funny noises." she explained.

"Henry, they're just crickets. They won't hurt you. They can't even get into your tent." Emma explained. "Come on, kid, I'll take you back and tuck you in." she suggested.

"I wanna sleep with you. Please?" he begged.

Emma stared at her son, wide eyed. **"By god, was she ever going to get relief from this ache in her loins?"** she thought. She looked over to Regina, who looked back with a pained expression. It was obvious that her thoughts were mirrored in the red haired woman's eyes. Taking a deep breath, she let it out slowly and ran her hand through her hair. Throwing her hands up at her sides, she gave in. "All right ... All right … but only for tonight. Okay?" she said.

"Okay, mom." Henry said happily as he crawled in next to Regina and snuggled against his mom's breasts.

Emma couldn't resist a smile. **"Lucky kid."** she thought. Out loud, she said, "I'm gonna go check on the campsite and make everything is secure. Be right back." Emma leaned in and kissed both Regina and Henry on the cheeks. After assuring herself that all was well, she went over to the bucket of water they kept next to the fire ring and reached in with both hands, pulling up a large hand full of water to splash over her heated face. **"Its gonna be a long night!"** Emma thought as she headed back to her tent.

PART 8

Regina woke up the next morning to find Emma missing and Henry sprawled out over the top of her. Dislodging herself from under her child without waking him up was no easy task, but with a little effort, she was free. She slipped on her silk robe and slippers and then grabbed the toiletries, towel, and a change of clothes and headed toward the showers. Before she got but a few feet up the trail, she saw Emma jogging toward her, dark sweat stains adorning her T-shirt on her chest and armpits, and a sheen of sweat glowing on her bare arms and legs. Noticing that Regina was on her way to the showers, she held her hand up in a 'don't move, I'll be right back' motion, as she ran by her to their tent. Moments later, she met Regina on the trail, with a clean towel and change of clothes of her own. Scooping Regina up into her arms, she swung the woman around in a circle before putting her back on her feet and kissing her soundly.

"Hey, you're all sweaty!" Regina complained.

"So ... You **were** on your way to the showers, weren't you?" Emma responded.

"Yeah." Regina replied.

"Want some company?" Emma asked, backing Regina up against a tree and pinning her there with her body.

"And if I say No?" Regina teased, looking up mischievously into sky blue eyes.

"Then I'll have to dishonor my family name by forcing myself upon you, my queen," Emma mused.

"Is that a threat or a promise, fair knight?" Regina teased.

"What would you **like** it to be, my queen?" Emma asked.

"Well, so far you haven't been very good about keeping your promises, brave knight. I desperately needed your special service last night, and you failed me," Regina said, reminding her about last night's frustrating end.

"Ah, my queen, but last night's folly was not my fault. The dragon child interrupted me. I had no choice but to yield to his power. Will you give me another chance, my queen?" Emma asked, taking a step back and bowing at the waist.

"Give me a moment, and I will consider it." Regina replied. A split second later, she continued, "Enough ... I have made my decision … To the showers! And when we are through dear knight, the shower stall had better not be the only wet thing in the room!"

A grin split Emma's face ear to ear. "You have my word, my queen. I will be at your service for as long as you need it. Total satisfaction, my queen, and wetness guaranteed." Emma stated.

"Lead the way, brave knight!" Regina said, taking Emma's arm as they strolled toward the showers.

For the next full hour, the women in that area of the campground curiously avoided the showers. Several could be seen approaching the building (including Snow and Cora), but quickly turned around and beat a hasty retreat at the sounds coming from within. On the way back to the campsite, Snow smiled to herself, thinking how she was going to handle Emma and Regina's little indiscretion. Soon, two very wet, and very satisfied women, one blonde, one brunette, walked hand in hand through the trails to their campsite.

Snow had set the percolator on the propane grill to brew not long after Regina and Emma left for their shower, so coffee was ready for them when they returned. Motioning for them to sit down at the table, Snow brought four mugs and the coffee pot over and served up the rich, dark liquid to each of them.

Cora sitting opposite her daughter and her wife, she took a sip her flavorful brew and said, "Which one of you is the screamer?"

Emma nearly choked on her coffee while both women turned fifteen shades of red. "You heard that, huh?" Emma asked, embarrassed, while Regina found something very interesting to look at in her coffee cup.

"Oh, my dear sheriff, the whole campground heard it. I suspect many of our fellow campers won't go near that shower again for several days. Sounded like someone had a polecat cornered in there … Soooo … which one of you is the screamer?" Cora asked again.

Emma and Regina looked at each other and then back at Cora. "She is!" they **both** said, pointing at each other. Snow quieting sat at her end of the table grinning into her coffee mug.

PART 9

The ladies were on their second cup of coffee when David came back to the campsite from his own shower. A grin splitting his face from ear to ear. "You should have heard the racket up at the showers!" he exclaimed, chuckling. "Who ever it was, sure was going at it hot and heavy!" he added, smiling broadly.

"Ahem ..." Snow said, clearing her throat to get David's attention while her hand ran through the back of her hair. David looked her way while she nodded her head sideways and raised her eyebrows at their daughter and her wife, who were very busy contemplating the top of the picnic table.

"Get out!" he shouted, eyes wide with disbelief. "No way … really? Well, I'll be ... which one of you is the screamer?" he asked.

"Oh god!" Regina said as she dropped her forehead to the table while Emma looked up at the sky. "Looks like rain," she said.

Regina and Emma were saved from further teasing by the sound of Henry waking up. When Snow noticed Henry coming out of Regina and Emma's tent, "Well that explains a lot!" Snow teased.

Emma reached her long arm up and grabbed a handful of Snow's dark hair. Pulling her down onto the bench beside her, she whispered into her mom's ear, "Enough … got it?" before releasing her.

TBC ...


	3. Chapter 3

PART 10

After a hearty breakfast, the group decided that they would try horseback riding in the morning, and then spend the afternoon at the beach. The stables were located on the opposite side of the campground from their sites. It was such a beautiful day, that the adults decided to walk, while Henry rode his bicycle. Walking hand in hand through the trails, Regina and Emma drew a lot of curious looks, some of them not so pleasant.

At one point on the trail, they passed a hiker who obviously disapproved of two women holding hands, and said as much. Cora was on him in a heartbeat, tackling him to the ground and sitting on his chest with her hands around his throat. "Take it back!" she demanded.

"Aright … Let … go!" the man complained.

"I said, take it back!" she demanded again.

Regina said, "Mother, release him this instant."

Emma reached down and took Cora by the shoulders. "Cora, let him go … he isn't worth the effort," she said to her mother-in-law.

"No, Emma ... he needs to be taught a lesson!" Cora replied.

"Cora! Let go of him … NOW!" David said, finally stepping up and taking charge of the situation.

Cora looked up at David and realized that he was quite serious. Looking back at the man on the ground, she spat into his face, "You are damned lucky, I no longer have magic. I would have turned you into the toad you are!"

"Mother!" Regina interrupted. "Please, just get off him and let him go. Emma's right - he isn't worth it, okay?"

Cora rose to her feet as David reached down and helped the man up. Thinking he was free and clear, the man was quite surprised when David twisted his arm behind him and slammed him face first up against a tree. Leaning into the man, David whispered into his ear, "The next time you bad mouth my daughter and her wife like that, you won't be so lucky, understand?"

The man nodded vigorously, then ran up the path as David released him.

David wiped the dirt off his hands as he grinned at the women. "I bet he'll think twice before he opens his mouth next time!" he said.

Emma placed a hand on her father's shoulder and said, "Thanks, dad." The group continued on down the trail toward the stables. As children often do with new things, Henry picked up the knack of horseback riding like he was born in the saddle. The adults, on the other hand, were another story ... some of them anyway.

The trail ride started out tame enough. The horses seemed to be well behaved and accustomed to walking the often used trails through the campground. Henry was riding happily, some distance in front of the adults. Snow's horse was spooked by a snake. The horse reared up onto its hind legs and whinnied in fear. Snow held onto the saddle horn for dear life, screaming her lungs out. Emma, Regina and David's horses automatically moved back away from their nervous sibling.

Snow's horse returned its front hooves to the ground, only to take off running across the meadow to escape the reptile. Snow, taken back to her early childhood memory of being trapped on a runaway horse holding on for dear life. She was bounced around unmercifully in the saddle, just trying not to fall off.

"I've got this," Regina said and took off after the renegade horse and rider as the rest of the group went to find Henry.

Regina, having learned to horseback ride as a child, was able to skillfully direct her steed toward Snow, and in no time, had caught up to the side of the runaway horse. By this time, poor Snow's feet had come out of the stirrups and she was just barely able to maintain her perch on the horse by the saddle horn in one hand and a grasp full of mane in the other.

Coming up beside Snow, Regina leaned over and grabbed the loose reins, pulling the frightened animal to a stop. Snow's eyes were wild with fear. Regina leaned over once more to calm the hysterical woman and ended up with Snow practically climbing up her arm and into her lap on the other horse. "Just like old times, Snow." Regina said. After helping Snow settle in front of her, she tied the reins of the other horse to the saddle and started back toward where Emma, David, Cora and Henry were waiting. Snow clung to the arm Regina had wrapped around her midsection, all the way back. Upon reaching the others, Regina lifted her up by the waist and easily deposited her in the front of David's saddle, where he wrapped his long arms around her and whispered soothing endearments to her during their ride back to the stable.

Snow was never so happy to have her feet back on solid ground as she was when David lowered her from the horse back at the stables. Snow was quiet on the walk back to the campsite, enduring the teasing from the other adults.

When they arrived, it was nearly lunch time. Emma and David took the van to the office to purchase some more fire wood as Regina set out to feed cold meat sandwiches and chips to everyone left behind who were sitting around the picnic table, patiently waiting for their lunch. Snow paced nervously around the campsite, hands on her hips. Every now and then, she'd stop and ran her hands up and down her backside.

Regina smiled knowingly. "Hurts, huh?" she asked.

"Oh yeah!" Snow said, rubbing her butt again.

Snow spent the rest of the day either standing or laying down. She thanked god that they had planned an afternoon at the beach, for it gave her the opportunity to lay on the blanket in the sand ... on her stomach for the better part of the afternoon.

PART 11

Snow was so sore the next morning, she could barely stand. Walking was pure torture and sitting was totally out of the question. After feeding breakfast to the crew, Regina talked Emma and David into taking Henry and Cora to explore the caves that the campground brochure had boasted about, while she and Snow soaked in the hot springs.

Putting on their bathing suits and grabbing clean towels, the two women set off toward the springs. Moments later, they were lounging in the hot water, lily pads floating around them as steam rose from the surface of the water. As luck would have it, they were alone. Sitting on the underwater ledge that skirted the man-made pool fed by the hot spring, Regina leaned her head back and sighed. "This feels wonderful. Don't you think, Snow?" she asked.

It had taken Snow a good 20 minutes to seat herself somewhat comfortably in the pool, shifting from cheek to cheek periodically to relieve residual discomfort. She too leaned her head back, closed her eyes and sighed. "Regina ... you are a life saver," she said. "Thank you for talking me into this … it feels great!" Having not slept well the night before because of a certain sore area of her anatomy, Snow promptly fell asleep with her head and arms resting on the edge of the pool. Regina looked at her former enemy and smiled, then leaned her head back and closed her own eyes.

Then it happened … "OW!" Regina screamed as a searing pain shot through her thigh, jolting her out of the most pleasant dream she could imagine. She jumped up out of the water, holding her leg and screaming.

"What the Hell!" Snow said, being startled awake by Regina's screams.

"Regina ... What is it!?" she said.

"Get out of the water, Snow ... quickly, get out!" Regina yelled.

"Why?" Snow asked.

"Snake! In the water!" Regina exclaimed.

Now it was Snow's turn to scream. Despite her sore bottom, Snow was out of the water like a shot, quickly scrambling around behind Regina and peering over her shoulder into the water in time to see a white bellied snake slither away.

"Oh my god … Oh my god!" Snow said.

"Snow, it bit me!" Regina shouted.

"What? Let me see." Snow demanded.

Looking at Regina's leg, it was obvious that the snake had indeed bitten Regina. There were two small holes in Regina's thigh, about half inch apart. "Are you okay, Regina? How do you feel?" Snow asked. Regina took a moment to take stock in how she felt. "I'm a little light headed, but I don't know if its' the snake bite or the scare that's responsible for it. My leg feels kind of weird though." she said.

It didn't take long for Snow to find a park attendant at the hot spring who arranged for a jeep to transport Regina to the campground infirmary. After a thorough examination and a description from the ladies about what the snake looked like, the doctor assured them that it was non-lethal, and that its venom would only cause a numbness that would wear off in a day or two. In the meantime, he prescribed immobility for Regina until the feeling returned to her limb.

"Great, just great!" Regina said. "Emma is going to freak out! What else can go wrong?"

"What do you mean?" asked Snow.

"Snow, Emma wasn't too crazy about this camping trip to begin with. She had a really bad camping experience when she was nine years old and this is going to bring back some bad memories for her. And, so far I'm inclined to agree with her. I mean, look what's happened so far … a flat tire on the interstate, that flirt at the restaurant, the tent poles, the shower incident, that homophobic guy on the trail, your ride on 'Trigger - Horse from Hell', now this snake bite! What else can go wrong?" she exclaimed.

Little did the ladies know, at that very moment, Emma was being rushed to the infirmary from the caves, where she had accidentally walked into a nest of mosquitoes.

PART 12

"Bugs! … I HATE bugs!" Emma ranted as Regina applied anti-itch cream to Emma's body. Her face was so swollen with bite marks that she was hardly recognizable. When the group of cave explorers arrived at the infirmary, the doctor immediately rushed Emma in and gave her a shot of adrenaline to combat the itch venom. Unfortunately, it wore off after about an hour, throwing Emma into a frenzy of scratching and rubbing, trying desperately to find some relief from the irritation.

Regina slapped Emma's hand away for the umpteenth time. "Stop that or you'll dig yourself raw!" Regina scolded ... again!

"Regina, this is driving me CRAZY!", she exclaimed, her voice rising an octave with each word spoken.

"Emma ... hold still. Your squirming is making this difficult. Don't forget, I have limited mobility here ... I can't go chasing you around the tent to spread this cream on you, you know!" Regina complained.

Emma tried to remain still, laying on her stomach in the tent while Regina applied the itch cream over her bare back. Neither woman spoke for long moments.

Finally, Emma turned her head and said to Regina, "Does it hurt?"

"Huh?" Regina said, looking up suddenly at the sound of Emma's voice. While running her hands over her wife's lean, muscular shoulders, she had allowed her mind to drift back to the dream she was having in the hot springs. Emma's voice startled her back to reality.

Emma's brow drew together in irritation. "I asked if it hurt." she repeated.

"Does what hurt?" she asked the taller woman, confused.

"The snake bite, Regina ... Hey, are you all right?" Emma asked, more than a little concerned about Regina's distracted state.

"Oh, that!" Regina said, smiling. "Sorry, I was a little distracted there … No, it doesn't hurt … it's quite numb as a matter of fact. Hurt when it happened though." she explained.

"Want me to kiss it and make it better?" Emma said, wiggling her eyebrows up and down, a sexy smile on her face as her eyes wandered to the place high up on Regina's thigh where the snake had attacked her.

Regina looked into Emma's face and smiled. "Cream's starting to work, huh?" she asked, leaning down and placing a light kiss on Emma's lips. Suddenly, Regina burst out laughing, throwing herself backward onto the pillows.

"What the hell is so funny?" Emma demanded.

Regina wrapped her hands around her midsection while she laughed and rolled around on the sleeping bag. "I'm sorry, dear … it's just that … your face … it looks so funny all swollen up like that!" she managed to say between hysterical laughter.

Emma was NOT amused.

"Stop it, Regina!" Emma demanded, a hurt expression on her swollen face.

"I'm sorry, Emma, really I am." Regina said, trying not to look at her wife.

Checking to see if Emma accepted her apology, she once again burst out laughing uncontrollably.

Emma grabbed her T-shirt, threw it on over her head and stormed out of the tent, ignoring Regina's apologies and pleas to return.

Not wanting to leave the campsite in her condition, Emma stomped back and forth in front of the campfire, kicking up dirt along the way. Snow was reclining in a nearby lounge chair, reading a book. "You wanna talk about it?" she asked her daughter.

Emma stopped and looked at Snow. "Snow, where is Henry?" she asked.

"David and Cora took him to the playground … Now stop avoiding the question. Sit." Snow ordered.

Emma looked like she was going to object, but then gave in and sat on the edge of the lounge chair, dropping her face into her hands.

"Talk to me." Snow said.

"She laughed at me, Snow." Emma pouted.

"Well, you DO kind of look funny right now, Emma" Snow said seriously.

Emma raised her eyebrows and looked at her mom. "You too?" she asked angrily.

Snow reached over and grabbed Emma's shoulders. "Close your eyes, Emma."

Emma looked at her as if she were insane. "Come on ... humor me." she pleaded.

Emma finally gave in and closed her eyes. A moment later, Snow said, "Okay, now open them."

Opening her eyes, she realized that Snow had fetched a mirror out of her tent and was now holding up in front of her face. Emma had no choice but to look directly at her image in it. Her first reaction was to open her eyes so wide that they bugged right out of her head. Her second reaction was to break out in hysterical laughter, bending over at the waist and clutching her stomach.

When she had finally regained control, she looked up at Snow and wiped the tears of laughter out of her eyes. "Oh god!" she said, catching her breath. "I've never laughed so hard in my life."

Snow too was struggling to regain control. "Now do you blame her?" came the question from the curly haired woman.

Emma had the decency to look embarrassed. "No, I guess not." she admitted. "I guess I should go do some damage control, huh?" she asked.

"Oh Yeah!" Snow said rising to her feet. "I think I'll go find David, Cora and Henry … We should be back in … say … two hours? Yeah, two hours sounds good."

Emma stood and hugged her mom tightly. "Thanks for making me see what a horse's ass I've been, Snow." she said.

"Don't you dare mention the word 'HORSE' in front of me! EVER!" Snow said jokingly as she headed up the trail toward the playground.

"Got it!" Emma replied as she headed back to her tent.

TBC ...


	4. Chapter 4

PART 13

The next morning found things pretty much back to normal, except that Emma looked like she had chicken pocks, considering the red welts she had all over her face, neck and arms from the mosquito bites. The swelling had gone down, though, and the itch cream had the itching under control, so the welts were tolerable. Mobility had returned to Regina's leg, however the skin around the bite mark was still numb. This pattern of healing was pretty much as the doctor had explained it to them, so they weren't concerned, knowing she would have full feeling back in a day or two.

Sitting around the breakfast table, the two families chatted amicably about plans for the day. Considering the excitement they had experienced the previous day, they were all willing to spend the day in relaxed non-involved activities. For Regina, Cora and Snow, that meant shopping.

"Shopping? You've got to be kidding, Regina... that's not relaxing!" Emma exclaimed, afraid that Regina would force her to go along for the ride. She hated shopping.

"Count me out." David said. "Shopping is definitely NOT for me. I opt for a day of fishing. What do you say?" Charming asked his grandson, who eagerly complied.

Emma shot him a sympathetic look that begged him to invite her along. David recognized desperation when he saw it. Taking pity on his daughter, he said, "Hey Emma, how about joining me and Henry?"

Emma broke out into a huge smile. "Sure!" she said, trying to sound nonchalant as she cast a sideways glance at Regina.

Regina walked up to her wife and stood directly in front of her. Looking up and meeting Emma's eyes, she smiled and said, "You are SO transparent, dear. Go … have a good time, and catch us some dinner? Okay?"

Emma leaned over and kissed Regina tenderly. Touching her forehead to Regina's she said, "Thanks.", then kissed her again before turning away and grabbing her fishing pole, following David and Henry down the trail to the lake.

Regina watched her go, then turned and looked at Snow. Snow reached her hand out and accepted the 'high-five' from Regina.

"Way to go," Snow said. "Now we can 'shop till we drop' without listening to the whining!"

"Ready ladies?" Regina said to her Snow and her mother. The three grown women cheered and raced each other to the car.

While the ladies enjoyed a day at the mall, Emma, David and Henry basked in the sunlight, out in a boat in the middle of the lake, happily catching dinner.

Sometime near midmorning, David removed his shirt, oblivious to the scorching rays of the sun. By mid-afternoon, when the gang rowed in for a lunch break, he was a total lobster.

As they pulled the boat up to the shore, Emma looked over at David and exclaimed, "Holy Shit, David ... Look at your back!"

David glanced over his shoulder and looked at his shoulder. "Ah, that's nothing … don't worry about it!" he said.

Emma looked at him doubtfully and grabbed the stringer of fish and tackle box while Henry took the poles and other tackle and headed back to the campsite. David walked ahead of Emma. "I don't know, David. It looks really bad from here," she said, pushing her baseball cap further back on her head.

David flexed his shoulders and felt the sting on his sun-baked skin. "Ow! Maybe you're right, Emma. It does kinda sting a little," he exclaimed.

"I suspect it will sting **a lot**, very soon!" Emma commented. "I'll rub some aloe salve into it when we get back to camp." she offered.

"Okay ... Sure ... Thanks!" he said.

Before the afternoon was over, Emma was calling Regina on the cell phone she carried in her purse.

"Emma?" Regina asked when she answered the phone.

"How did you know it was me?" Emma asked.

"Who else would be calling me here, dear?" Regina explained.

"Oh, yeah ... well, I guess that makes sense." Emma replied.

"Emma, is everything okay? Is Henry …" Regina began.

"The kid's fine, Regina. David, however, is another story. Look … I need you to stop at an herbal medicine store and pick up some more aloe salve … lots of it." Emma said.

"Aloe salve?" Regina asked. Then suddenly remembering that they used the salve for burns, she said, "God, Emma … he didn't!"

Snow, who was standing at Regina's elbow when the call came in suddenly realized that they were talking about David. Her eyebrows creased into a question mark, which she pointed directly at Regina.

"He did, Regina. Red as a lobster." Emma replied.

"And what about you and Henry?" Regina asked.

"No problem there ... We had our shirts and hats on. No, David's the only cooked goose here," Emma supplied.

"Okay ... aloe salve ... lots of it. All right, Emma. I think there's an herb store right here in the mall. We'll be on our way as soon as I pick up the salve. We should be there within a half hour, okay?" she asked.

"Okay, love ... see you in a bit. I love you ..." Emma said.

"I love you too, Emma. Bye," Regina replied, closing up the cell phone and slipping it back into her purse.

Snow looked at Regina. "Well?" she asked impatiently.

"Snow, did you bring sun screen?" Regina asked.

Snow looked at her blankly for a moment, then realization hit. "Oh god, tell me he didn't … damn! Regina, sometimes I swear that man has shit for brains!" she exclaimed.

"Aloe salve … herb store" Regina directed as the three women gathered up their packages. Ten minutes later, they were headed toward the car and on their way back to a very uncomfortable David.

PART 14

"Kill me, Snow ... please!" voiced a very uncomfortable David as Snow rubbed the soothing salve across this shoulders. David was sitting at the picnic table, bent over with his head laying against his crossed arms.

"All right, I'm done," Snow announced. "Here, put this back on," she said, handing him his shirt.

"I really don't want to put anything on it, Snow," David said refusing the shirt and earning an impatient glare from Snow..

Emma was standing near the campfire, stoking it to life for the burgers they planned to grill for lunch. The area surrounding the fire ring was bathed in bright sunlight. She grinned as she listened to David whine about his sun burn. "David, come here a minute, will you?" she said.

David rose to his feet slowly, each move stretching the burnt skin on his back, making the nerve endings scream out in protest.

Once he reached Emma, she handed him the poker. "Here, stoke this up for me while I line the grill with tin foil. Okay?" she asked.

David took the poker and started moving the coals around as Emma walked toward Snow. The heat from the growing fire, combined with the sun beating down on his back were unbearable.

Emma approached Snow and reached out for David's shirt. Winking at Snow, she turned around and walked back to David. David looked up as Emma neared, the pain very clearly apparent on his face.

"Ready to put this on now?" she asked, handing him the shirt.

He stood up straight and growled at her, grabbing for the shirt at the same time. "Women!" he muttered under his breath … "Always got to prove a point!"

Snow quickly approached David and helped him pull the T-shirt down over his shoulders with as little pain as possible while Emma walked over to Regina, who was making hamburger patties.

"And they call me Evil … Emma, that was so mean!" Regina accused, a half smile threatening to break across her face.

Emma focused her attention on Regina's hands, which were squeezing and shaping the ground beef into a circle. Emma was mesmerized by the sight.

"Emma?" Regina said, drawing the blonde woman's attention away from the meat in her hands.

"What? Oh, I'm sorry Regina, I wasn't paying attention ... what did you say?" Emma asked.

Regina knew where this was leading. "Just what were you distracted by, my tall beautiful lover?" she said seductively, leaning in so that she was whispering into Emma's neck, leaving a light kiss there before pulling away to look into Emma's eyes.

Emma's body jolted from the contact. She gulped audibly and looked back into pools of deep brown eyes.

Regina never broke eye contact as she lowered the burger to the tin covered grill, then reached over to wipe her hands on the towel laying on the table.

Emma ran her tongue across suddenly parched lips as she held Regina's eyes.

Reaching across the table for a bowl of strawberries, Regina chose an especially succulent one and lifted it to her lips, which parted, ever so slightly to allow the ripe berry entrance into the cavern beyond. Regina's fingers followed the berry into her mouth as her tongue caressed the digits, licking the sweet juice from the tips, snaking out moments later to lap up the juice that had run down her chin.

Emma's eyes opened so wide Regina thought they would pop right out of her head. "God, Regina!" she said in a whisper.

Reaching for another berry, Regina lifted it into Emma's mouth. Emma's lips parted and then closed around Regina's fingers as the older woman pushed the berry past her teeth. Regina threw her head back and closed her eyes as an intense feeling a desire jolted her to her very core as Emma sucked her fingers clean. Now it was Regina's turn to lose control of her legs. "Emma!" she whispered.

"Okay, you two... any more of that and those burgers next to you will cook themselves just from your body heat!" Cora exclaimed as she approached the women.

Regina and Emma had the good graces to look embarrassed as their eyes roamed all over the camp site, skillfully avoiding Cora's smirking face.

"Besides, you're making me jealous," Cora added sadly, while walking away from the pair.

Emma looked back at Regina and smiled. "Now what was it you were saying about me being mean?" she asked as she drew Regina's fingers towards her mouth once more.

PART 15

As predicted, David put in a very uncomfortable few days. The tender skin on his back protested at a mere wisp of wind blowing across it. It wasn't long before the damaged area tightened and pulled with each slight movement. The aloe salve managed to keep most of the pain away, but his discomfort level was still extremely high. David had to stay out of the direct rays of the sun in order to bear it, and as a result, spent most of his time inside their tent, or in the shade of the trees. It was for this reason, that David declined the hiking trip that Regina and Snow had planned for the group. Emma, not really wanting to hike, used David as a convenient excuse to stay behind.

"Regina, I hate to leave him here alone. I think I'll stay and keep him company, if you don't mind." Emma said.

"Are you sure, dear? You're going to miss a good walk." Regina answered.

"Yeah, I'm sure ... You guys go ahead and have a good walk." Emma replied, leaning down and kissing her wife.

Soon, the group were on their way up the path, using the trail map they had picked up at the office, while Emma and David spent the afternoon playing cards.

PART 16

"Regina, I have to pee!" Cora whined.

"Mother, can you hold it until we get back to camp?" Regina suggested to the older woman.

"No daughter, I cannot. I need to pee NOW!" she complained again.

"Okay ... okay. Come on," Regina said, leading her mother into the bushes. Looking back over her shoulder, she said to the rest of the group, "The rest of you might want to take advantage of the pit stop as well ... it's a long hike back to the campsite."

Moments later, after a trip to the bushes for everyone, the little entourage was on its way back to camp.

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. Henry occupied himself playing with the remote control car he had brought with him. The remaining adults gathered around the picnic table playing board games and enjoying each other's company. Later that evening after a satisfying supper, they all sat around the campfire and roasted marshmallows. Before long, Henry had started to nod off and was sent promptly to bed.

Considering David's condition, the Charming tent was pretty quiet that night. The same, however, was not true for the Swan-Mills tent. After tucking Henry in, Emma led Regina back to their tent and gently laid her down on the sleeping bags. Covering the brunette woman's body with her own, she placed her elbows on either side of Regina's head and supported her weight on them.

Looking down into Regina's face, she said, "Regina, I have never known anyone as beautiful as you. Your beauty extends the boundaries of physical appearance, my love. I love you with all my heart. I feel honored that you have chosen to love me." Leaning down, Emma placed a passionate kiss on Regina's mouth.

Regina's breath caught in her throat at the intensity of the kiss. "God Emma. You have no idea what you do to me," Regina exclaimed breathlessly as Emma nibbled on her neck.

Emma pulled back and looked at Regina. "If it's the same as what you do to me, love, then yes, I do know," she said, leaning back down for another kiss, then pulling back once more to look into Regina's face.

Emma smiled wickedly. She dove into Regina's mouth with a passion that left them both breathless. Hours later, there was no doubt left in Regina's mind as to Emma's stamina as she melted into the arms of the woman she loved and fell fast asleep.

The next morning, Regina was awaked by this nagging itch on her back side. Reaching back to relieve it, she encountered Emma, who was spooned up close to her. Reaching down between their naked bodies, Regina successfully found and relieved the itch, only to be nagged by another one on the other cheek.

"Damn!" Regina said as she rolled over onto her stomach and tried unsuccessfully to look over her shoulder at her backside.

Emma was awakened by Regina's fidgeting. Raising herself up onto one elbow, she looked at Regina and asked, "Regina, honey, what's wrong?"

"My behind itches!" Regina exclaimed.

"Run that by me again!" Emma said, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

"My behind itches and I can't see why!" Regina exclaimed again, craning her neck to see.

Emma leaned in to check the matter out.

"Holy Shit, Regina!" Emma said loudly.

"What? ... Emma, what is it!?" Regina said worriedly.

"Regina ... You have poison ivy." Emma replied.

Regina jumped up onto her knees and strained once more to see her backside. "Emma … no … it can't be. How could I get poison ivy … Oh god! I know how! My mother just had to go pee in the bushes! Emma, get up, quickly ... we need to check on Snow and Henry!" Regina said, nearly hysterical. "What about Cora?" Emma inquired. Regina was furious, "This is all my mother's fault! Let her suffer!"

Emma threw the blanket off herself and started to rise.

Regina took one look at Emma and shrieked! "Emma! Oh my god! You're covered too!"

Emma looked down on herself and saw dozens of red spots all over her abdomen. "Aaarrrgghhh!" she screamed.

Regina quickly dove into the first aid kit they had packed and retrieved the bottle of calamine lotion and a few cotton balls. Within minutes, Emma's abdomen was a pretty shade of fleshy pink, as was Regina's butt. Throwing on their clothes, they climbed out of their tent, armed with the lotion and went in search of more victims of yesterday's visit to the bushes.

No sooner had they cleared their tent, when they heard Snow's voice loud and clear coming in their direction. "Thank you very much, Regina!" she ranted. "**The rest of you might want to take advantage of the pit stop **... she says … **It's a long hike back to the campsite … **she says … Damn it, Regina! You can play connect the dots on my ass!"

Regina approached Snow with her hands up, trying to calm the distraught woman down. "Okay, Snow ... I know ... I have it too, and so does Emma," Regina said, trying to soothe her mother-in-law's anger.

"Emma? How did Emma get it? She wasn't even with us yesterday … Oh, I get it … you two rolled around like a couple of crazed weasels last night and she caught it from you! Well, serves you right!" Snow raged into their faces.

"Snow." Emma said in her best intimidating voice. "Regina had no way of knowing there was poison ivy in the bushes ... so back off. Okay?"

Snow looked steadily at Emma and realized the logic of her words. Throwing her hands up in the air, she said, "Okay ... Okay ... you're right ... I'm sorry Regina. Question is, what do we do now?"

Regina held up the calamine lotion. "How do you like the color pink, Snow?" she asked.

Before long, each member of the camping party, save David, had been doused in pink.

Throughout the day, as other campers passed their campsite, curious glances were cast at the menagerie of gropers, each grabbing at various body parts, trying to get relief from the itching.

After one particularly interested viewer passed by, Snow turned to Emma and said, "They probably think we have body lice or something..."

Emma just chuckled and reached for the bottle of calamine.

TBC ...


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Thank you to everyone who has reviewed, are following and have favorite this story.**

PART 17

Within a day or two, the Charming/Swan-Mils clan had recovered enough to resume normal camping activities. Early on the second day after the poison ivy incident, they packed the cooler with sandwiches, soda and chips and headed to the beach.

Henry headed straight for the water with Cora following closely behind. The adults set up the blankets, beach chairs, umbrellas and picnic table. Soon the area was arranged and everyone was settled in peacefully. David, still sensitive from his sunburn, sat in the shade of the umbrella while the women sat rubbing oil on each other's backs before laying out on the blanket, all in a row, on their stomachs with Regina book-ended by Emma and Snow.

They made an impressive sight, they were all approximately the same height, one blonde, the other two with dark hair, one with shoulder length hair the other with a pixie cut, all slim and well toned and scantily clad in skimpy bikini's. David sat there laughing as more than one gawkier tripped over his feet onto his face in the sand because he was too busy watching the ladies and not looking where he was going. Halfway through the morning, the ladies rolled over to sun their fronts after liberally spreading more oil over their lean bodies. While they lay there, Emma reached out and covered Regina's hand with her own, entwining their fingers together.

After a time Henry and Cora moved from the water to the beach and began building a rather large sand castle. The boy worked on the main structure, while his grandmother built castle walls and a moat surrounding the entire display.

Soon, Emma became bored with just lying there. Opening her eyes, she peered over at Regina and Snow and saw that their eyes were closed, apparently asleep. A spark of mischief ignited in her belly as she reached over and grabbed a handful of sand. Grinning ear to ear, she rolled over onto her side, and held her prize over Regina's chest. Very slowly, she allowed the grains of sand to escape her fist as she moved her hand slowly downward, across Regina's breasts and abdomen. Regina absently brushed them away in her sleep. Grabbing another handful of sand, Emma continued her trek down one of Regina's legs and then up the other.

All the while Emma was engaging in her mischief, David was watching, chucking under his breath. "She's going to kill you when she wakes up." he warned her.

"**If** she can catch me, that is!" Emma remarked, smiling evilly up at David.

When Emma was done, she leaned back and observed her handiwork. Regina was covered with a fine layer of sand. "Not bad if I dO say so myself!" Emma commented. Then, looking over at the sleeping Snow, she again grinned and looked at David.

David broke out in a huge smile when he read the intention in Emma's eyes. "Do it!" he said.

Emma giggled with glee as she grabbed another handful of sand and proceeded to paint Snow with a fine layer of dirt, finishing just as Regina started to stir.

Regina felt an itchy feeling on her chest, just at the base of her neck. Reaching up sleepily, she began to scratch. Suddenly, she realized that something was wrong. Sitting up quickly, she felt a considerable amount of sand slide inside her bathing suit as her hand came away from her chest, covered in suntan oil and sand. Emma moved quickly to her feet, ready to make her getaway.

"What the hell?" she exclaimed, coming instantly awake. She looked up at Emma, who was standing beside the blanket, trying her best to hold back her laughter. "Ms. Swan!" she growled.

Regina looked over to Snow and saw that she too, was covered in sand. "Snow ... Snow!" Regina said, while shaking her mother-in-law awake. "Snow, wake up."

Snow brushed Regina's hand away. "Leave me alone ... I'm on vacation for crying out loud!" she complained.

"You're also covered with sand!" Regina exclaimed.

"What?" Snow yelled, sitting up abruptly. She too felt her bathing suit fill with sand. "**Who** did this?" she demanded. "Your daughter," Regina answered.

Hearing David chuckle, Regina and Snow quickly looked up at him, while he tried very hard to keep a straight face. Realizing that David and Emma were probably in on the joke together, the two ladies jumped to their feet, scattering sand in all directions, except that, of course, that was stuck to the suntan lotion covering their bodies.

David and Emma looked at each other and said in one voice, "Uh, Oh!" then took off running toward the water with Regina and Snow right on their heels. Reaching the water's edge, Emma's long legs allowed her to make huge leaps through the water until it reached mid-thigh, dramatically slowing her down and allowing Regina to catch up with her.

Working together, the two women managed to grab Emma and David, pulling them under the water before they shook free of their captors and returned the favor. Soon, they were frolicking in the water like children, splashing and dunking each other, screeching and laughing hysterically.

In one particularly enthusiastic tackle, Regina pulled Emma down into the water, by the straps to her bikini top. When Emma came up for air, her top didn't come up with her, but instead, floated happily away from the splashing adults. Emma stood there in all her glorious nakedness, water running in sheets from her hair, onto her breasts and back into the water. Regina immediately pulled Emma down into the water and then jumped in front of her, with her back to the woman, to hide her wife's nakedness from everyone in the water and on the beach.

The dunking war was on again between Snow and David. Snow had pulled her husband under the water. David resurfaced, spitting and sputtering.

"Why you little … " David growled as he took off after Snow who was running as fast as she could through the water. He caught her in less than a minute, threw her over his shoulder, and headed toward the shore. As he approached the beach, he stumbled over the bucket Henry had been using to fill the moat, lost his footing and landed on top of Snow, right in the middle of the sand castle that Henry and Cora had just finished building.

There was dead silence as Henry stood there, slack jawed, eyes bulging, at the mess that was once the fruits of their labor. Henry and Cora looked at each other incredulously then yelled together, "GET'EM!" before charging the two adults who were laying in the middle of the sand pile. Between the two of them, they managed to bury David and Snow with sand and mud.

In the meantime, Regina manage to retrieve Emma's bikini top and had tied up the strings enough to make it back to the beach to retrieve Emma's T-shirt. As Emma passed her parents laying there in the mud, Snow looked up at the pair and cursed. "Damn! I have sand in places that have never seen the light of day! I'll get you for this, Emma!"

Emma threw her hands up and replied. "What did I do?" Turning to Regina, she smiled and winked at her wife before taking her hand and walking back to the picnic table to prepare lunch, leaving David and Snow heading for the water again to rinse off the offending sand.

PART 18

The day at the beach turned out to be wonderfully relaxing. Considering that the adult's antics totally destroyed the sand castle that Henry and his grandmother had built, they committed themselves to assisting in the reconstruction, and thus, spent the rest of the day crawling around the sand like a bunch of ants, shaping and molding the sand into an elaborate labyrinth of buildings, roads and walls.

The adults worked diligently, long after Henry had lost interest and retreated to the playground to pursue other activities. They made quite an interesting sight ... three women (all scantily clad in bikini's) and one man, on their hands and knees, covered in mud from their knees to their toes, and from fingertips to elbows, scurrying around their creation like sand crabs. Cora stood over them supervising their efforts. Finally, they were done and stood back to look at their work of art.

Snow had placed her hands on her hips and cocked her head sideways to look at the small kingdom they had created in the sand. "Kind of went overboard, didn't we?" she commented.

"Well, maybe the gallows outside the dungeons were a bit much." David remarked.

Emma was standing behind Regina, her sand-covered hands resting on Regina's shoulders. She too cocked her head to one side. "Well, maybe, David, but where else would you put the gallows? I mean, if you're going to have a dungeon, you need gallows, right?" she asked. "We are talking about your castle back home, after all."

"I don't understand why we needed a dungeon in the first place!" Snow said.

"Where else would you put your prisoners, Snow?" Regina asked.

And the fight was on …

PART 19

Later that evening, after Henry went to sleep, the adults sat around the campfire contemplating their day. The atmosphere was definitely more congenial then earlier that afternoon, however, a tinge of uneasiness remained. With their chairs in a semicircle around the campfire, book-ended by Emma and David, the family sat quietly, staring into the flames. Finally, after the silence became unbearable, Regina reached her arm over toward Snow, palm up, and placed it on the armrest of Snow's lawn chair. Snow looked over at her and smiled, before placing her hand in Regina's, lacing their fingers together in a bond of friendship.

"I'm sorry, Snow." Regina said softly, capturing Snow's eyes in her gaze. "Me too." Snow replied, squeezing her fingers a little tighter around Regina's.

Both women looked back at the fire while a more comfortable silence permeated the air, descending over the group like a blanket.

David reached over and took Snow's chin in his grasp. "Looks like someone is tired. Ready to turn in, sweetheart?" he asked.

Snow smiled and nodded her head. Rising to her feet, she leaned down and showered both of her daughter and daughter-in-law with hugs and kisses before wishing them pleasant dreams, and following David into their tent.

Once David and Snow were gone, Emma reached for Regina's other hand and gave it the same treatment Snow had lavished on it's mate, kissing each knuckle in turn, all the while, maintaining her focus on the fire before them.

Regina's heart began to pound wildly in her chest. Where Regina felt sisterly affection for Snow's actions, what she was feeling under Emma's ministrations was something quite different. Tilting her head to one side, she closed her eyes as Emma's lips roamed over the sensitive skin on the back of her hand.

"God, Emma. Do you know what you're doing to me?" Regina whispered.

Emma responded by turning Regina's hand over and kissing her palm before slowly working her way toward Regina's wrist to the tender skin on the inside of her forearm.

Regina gasped with pleasure as Emma's tongue flit around the crook of her elbow and worked it's way upwards across her well-toned biceps before finding the hollow on her neck carved out by her collar bone. Regina threw her head back sharply to allow the dark haired woman greater access to her neck.

Reaching up with her free hand, Emma cupped the side of Regina's face and righted her head so that she was looking deep into the chocolate pools before her. Emma's eyes roamed over Regina's face, watching the firelight dance patterns across her lover's brow.

"Gina, I have never seen such beauty in my life. You stop my heart with one look." Emma exclaimed, breathing rapidly.

Regina fell into the green eyes that had locked into a trance-like state. Narrowing her eyes into sensual slits, the blonde head leaned forward and touched her forehead to that of her lover. Closing her eyes, she whispered the words meant only for Emma's ears. "Make love to me, Emma. I need to feel you. Make me yours."

Grabbing both sides of Regina's face in her palms, Emma turned the woman's face towards hers and dove into her mouth with wild abandon, her tongue seeking and gaining access to the sweetness waiting inside. For long moments, the women tasted each other, probing organs memorizing every hidden curve and crevice within, faces tilted at opposite angles to maximize their pleasure.

Soon, Emma abandoned Regina's mouth and moved to place a string of kissing along her jaw line and down her neck. Regina clung to Emma's head by two handfuls of blonde hair, holding her captive, begging for the nips and bites that were flooding her center with spasms of desire.

"Emma ... please." Regina said, grabbing at Emma's tank top, trying to push it down over her shoulder. "Please ..." Regina begged.

Emma dove back into Regina's mouth, capturing her lover's bottom lip between her teeth, before invading the moist cavern once more with her probing tongue. In one easy motion, she reached under Regina's legs and lifted her up, without breaking the contact between their mouths, and walked toward their tent. Dropping to one knee, she rested Regina there as she reached over and unzipped their tent.

Moments later, they were laying side by side on the sleeping bags, hands roaming over each other with an urgency born of intense sexual need. "God, Regina. I want you so much!" Emma growled as she pushed Regina's T-shirt over her head, throwing it into the corner of the tent before reaching out to squeeze the generous mounds exposed before her.

Regina instinctively arched her back to raise her chest closer to Emma. The sheriff accepted the blatant invitation as she leaned down to take Regina's sweet offering into her mouth, nipping and suckling, capturing the swollen nubs between her teeth until tiny cries of pain escaped Regina's lips, and tremors of desire radiated through her lover's body.

"Emma, you are driving me mad. Please ... I need you, now!" Regina demanded.

Just as Emma reached down to unbutton Regina's shorts, a loud shuffling noise erupted from just outside their tent. Emma's head snapped up, ears perked and listening for further sounds.

Regina's desire had dulled her senses as confusion set in at her lover's sudden retreat. "Emma, don't do this to me ... please." Regina begged, trying to pull Emma's mouth back toward her breasts.

Emma reached up and placed her index finger across her own lips. "Shhhh." she told Regina, while she strained once more to hear more.

"Emma, what is it?" Regina asked, finally realizing that something else had caught Emma's attention.

"I don't know. Stay here ... I'll be right back." she told the smaller woman as she grabbed the flashlight and clicked it on.

Holding the light out in front of her, she unzipped the tent and slowly made her way outside. She scanned the entire campsite with the bright yellow beam, allowing it to fall on each of the other tents, assuring herself that all was safe and secure.

Walking around the entire perimeter of the camp, she came across a set of animal prints near the refuge barrel. Emma smiled to herself as she said under her breath, "Critters! Harmless enough! I must of scared them off." Scanning the site one more time, Emma satisfied herself that they were safe, before returning to her tent, to an evening that promised to bring out her own animalistic nature.

Had anyone else been awake, they would have been convinced that there were indeed wild critters around ... at least two of them ... critters that growled and groaned, and occasionally giggled before shrieking out in near ear-piercing tones, and then quieting down for the night.

PART 20

The early hours of the morning found Regina and Emma entwined in a lover's embrace, to the point where it was not obvious where one naked body started and the other left off. It was in this position that they were greeted by the dawn. It was this position that Regina struggled to free herself from in order to answer the call of nature. Finally escaping the circle of Emma's arms, she quickly located and donned her T-Shirt and shorts before making her way out of the tent and up the trail to the bath house.

Regina was still half asleep as she made her way to the bathrooms and back, her eyes barely open, her intentions focused on returning to bed, to the arms of her wife and lover. It was with these thoughts that Regina approached their campsite. It was with these thoughts that she blindly walked into the campsite and nearly into the arms of an intruder. A tall, hairy, black, 300 pound intruder, with big teeth and sharp claws.

Regina stopped dead, a mere 20 feet separating herself from their visitor. Paralyzed with fear, she did the only thing she could think of ... she screamed.

Within seconds, the entire campsite erupted, as well as those of a few neighboring sites. The bear reared up onto it's hind legs, teeth exposed, guttural growls emitting from its throat. David, Snow, Emma, Cora and Henry emerged rapidly from their tents, in various states of undress. "Cool!" came from Henry, who promptly received a slap to the back of the head from Cora.

"Everybody freeze!" Emma shouted. "Don't move … don't make any threatening motions." she commanded.

Regina stood her ground, frozen to the spot, unable to move, terrified beyond description as the face-off began. The bear dropped to all fours and slowly moved toward Regina.

"Regina, please don't move!" Emma urged.

Regina stood ramrod straight, not moving a muscle as the bear circled and sniffed her. "Oh god! ... Oh god!" Regina muttered under her breath as the bear investigated her presence.

As soon as the bear decided that Regina was really just a weird looking tree, he walked away from her and pursued his original goal ... that of raiding the food stores. Within minutes, the food locker had been torn open and the rest of the supplies eaten or scattered about by the carnivore, all the while, the two families were rooted where they stood, motionless and scared.

After the bear had made short work of their food supplies, he turned and attempted to saunter back into the forest, but fell short of his goal, thanks to a tranquilizer dart from the park ranger's gun. Apparently, one of the neighboring sites had summoned the ranger, and he had arrived in time to stop the perpetrator from fleeing the scene of the crime. Fortunately for the campers, the only victim there, had been their food supplies, which they were completely out of now that the bear had helped himself.

As soon as it became obvious that the bear was down for the count, Regina ran to Emma and wrapped her arms around the woman's waist. She was shaking and trembling in a state of shock. Emma in turn, wrapped her arms around Regina and held her close as she silently asked David and Snow to check on Henry.

Finally, Regina calmed down enough to take in her surroundings. The first thing she realized was that Emma was naked. Regina's scream had immediately roused Emma from sleep and caused her to spring into action, without a thought for clothing.

Pulling back out of Emma's embrace, Regina looked into her wife's face and said, "Do you always have to take things so literally, love?"

Emma was obviously confused and raised her eyebrows to Regina in a silent plea for explanation.

"**BARE** essentials? **BARE** necessities? **BARE**foot In The Park ... or in THIS case, in the campground?" Regina prompted as she ran her eyes up and down Emma's body in exaggerated motions.

All of the sudden, Emma realized that she was standing there, stark naked, surrounded by her family, the park ranger and neighboring campers, not to mention one comatose black bear.

"Holy Shit!" she exclaimed as she dove for cover into their tent.

Regina threw her head back and laughed. "I can **BARE**ly take all this excitement!" she exclaimed.

"Reginaaaaa!" came the warning voice from inside their tent.

"**BARE** with us, Emma ... We'll only tease you about this for say … a week!"

Regina continued to pick.

"Regina Coralline Swan-Mills … If you don't cut that out, we'll see who can **BARE**ly take the excitement!" Emma threatened.

"Uh, oh … she's using my full name!" Regina said to the audience of family around her. "I'm shaking in my boots out here, Emma. I can't possibly **BARE** up under this burden of fear!" she teased again.

Suddenly, without warning, Emma shot out of the tent, fully dressed.

"Uh, oh!" Regina exclaimed as she turned and ran as fast as she could down the trail, a grinning Emma tight on her heels.

TBC ...

**YOUR REVIEWS ARE APPRECIATED!**


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: I think this group of campers have suffered enough, so I am bringing this story to an end. I hope you all enjoyed it. Thank you to everyone who took the time to review. Your comments and suggestions are always appreciated.**

Part 21

Because the bear had made short work of their food supply, it was necessary for Regina and Snow to visit a neighboring super market to replenish the basic necessities while Emma and David occupied Henry. They had only a couple of days left before their vacation was over, so shopping didn't take nearly as long, nor fill as much space in the car as when they set out almost two weeks earlier. Soon, the women arrived back at the campsite and stowed away their booty for later consumption. This time, they were sure to store it well out of the reach of critters, in plastic bags hung high into the trees.

Looking around the abandoned area, Regina commented on its bareness. "I wonder where everyone is?" she asked out loud.

"Probably at the park or the beach." Snow replied as she watched Regina prepare to leave the site. "Hey, where are you going?" she asked, stopping Regina in mid-step.

Regina looked back over her shoulder. "To look for them. Where else?" she said, stating the obvious.

"Regina ... are you nuts? Look! We actually have free time to ourselves for a change! Let's enjoy it!" Snow exclaimed.

Regina turned around to look at Snow. Placing her hands on her hips and planting a look of wonder on her face, she looked around and said, "You're right, Snow! Okay ... so what do you want to do?"

Snow walked over to the ice chest and extracted two Wild Berry wine coolers. Handing one over to Regina, she screwed the cap off hers and sat down in one of the reclining lawn chairs. "I, for one," she said, "am planning on relaxing, reading, sleeping, and enjoying a refreshing cooler on a hot summer day ... not necessarily in that order." she added, grinning broadly at her former step-mother.

Regina took the hint and quickly retrieved a book from her tent and pulled up her own lawn chair beside Snow.

The next several hours were spent as Snow had predicted ... drinking wine coolers, reading, drinking wine coolers, talking, drinking wine coolers, napping, drinking wine coolers, giggling … all necessarily **IN** that order. By the time the rest of the family returned to the campsite, there where eight empty wine cooler bottles scattered on the ground under the lawn chairs, and two very relaxed, but giggly ladies sprawled on top.

Henry was the first one to arrive at the site just before sunset. Running into the center of the campsite, he stopped short when he saw his mom and grandma in obviously inebriated state. He took one look at them and ran back in the direction he had come. Within minutes, Emma, David and Cora arrived, having been alerted by Henry. Emma stood at the foot of the lawn chairs, hands on her hips, and looked down sternly at the two women.

"Just **what** do you think you're up to?" she asked the drunken women.

Regina looked up at Emma. "What're we up to?" she asked. Then, looking at Snow, she said, "Well, I'm about five foot nine … what 'bout you Snow?" she asked, a silly grin on her face.

Snow looked up as though trying to see the top of her own head. "I don't know … probably five six?"

Snow and Regina looked at each other and broke down into peals of laughter.

Emma was trying hard to hide the grin threatening to break out on her own face. Shaking her head, she walked away from the women and back to David.

"Looks like you and I get to cook supper tonight!" she commented.

A chorus of groans rose from Henry and Cora at the mention of Emma and David cooking.

"Ma, is that a good idea?" Henry asked. "The last time you cooked, I was able to use the hamburgers for hockey pucks!" he added.

"Thanks so much for the compliment, kid!" Emma answered. "Well David, how are **you** at cooking." she asked. David just stared at his daughter and his lips moved but no sound was forthcoming. Emma looked over at Cora and asked, "Cora, any chance you can …" Cora just stood there shaking her head from side to side.

"Okay … guess that answers **that** question!" Emma replied, running her hand through her blonde locks. "Okay, kid." she said to Henry. "You and grandmother go rummage through the food supplies and find something I can't possibly screw up, okay?"

As Henry was sorting through the variety of goodies that Regina and Snow had picked up that day, Emma pulled David closer to the campfire where she could see the bandage on his face more clearly.

"You took a nasty hit on the nose," she said as she pulled the bandage away from David's nose.

Unknowing to Emma, Snow had risen from her lawn chair and retrieved another two bottles of wine coolers for her and Regina, while Emma was preoccupied with David by the fire.

After replacing the bandage, Emma turned to re-pack the medical supplies, and noticed that the ladies had full bottles of coolers in their hands.

"Now where the hell did you get those?" she said, exasperated with the women.

Regina and Snow looked up at the tall woman with grins on their faces, trying very hard to look innocent, swaying back and forth in their chairs, just barely able to keep their balance.

"From the cooler." Snow answered as she walk past her daughter and made her way over to her husband.

Snow shrieked when she saw the bandage on David's nose.

"Oh my God! David! What happened?" she yelled.

"Cwoquet." he said in a nasal tone of voice.

"Crow kit?" Regina repeated. "What the hell is that?" she asked, belching loudly.

"Ooops! Sorry." Regina added, covering her mouth, cheeks glowing red from drunken embarrassment.

"No ... Cwoquet. We were pwaying cwoquet and our daughter here, hit me wight in the nose wit her ball!" David explained, pointing to Emma, who was standing guiltily nearby.

Now it was Regina's turn to sit up quickly, only she wasn't as graceful as Snow, and succeeded in falling flat on her face on the ground next to the lawn chair.

Miraculously, she managed to keep the wine cooler from spilling when she fell.

Emma just shook her head side to side and helped her back into the chair. "I think you've had enough wine, Regina." she said, reaching for the cooler in Regina's hand.

"Nooooo!" Regina replied, pulling her drink in close and holding on to it tightly.

"Mine!" she added.

"Okay ..." Emma said skeptically. "It's your head!"

"Speaking of heads ... what did you do to your father?" Snow asked, taking another long drink from her wine cooler.

Emma seated Regina more securely in the lawn chair and turned to Snow. "Like he said, we were playing croquet. His ball had hit mine, so I had the right to send it flying. It's not my fault that he was standing in the direct line of fire." Emma explained. "We rushed him to the clinic for treatment ... he has a broken nose, and will sport very attractive raccoon eyes for a couple of weeks." Emma added.

"And I'm having twouble bweathing." David added.

Further discussion on David's injury was halted by Cora and Henry proudly dropping the contents of food they had carried in their arms, on the picnic table.

Emma turned to the two. "Did you find something edible?" she asked.

Her son and mother-in-law grinned as they stepped aside and revealed their idea of a good supper. There on the table, were cookies, chips, pretzels, cold cereal, cold hot dogs, and several cans of soda.

Emma looked at David and then back at the snack food on the table. Realizing she didn't have to cook any of it, she looked back at David and grinned. "Ah, what the hell!... Eat up!" she said.

PART 22

David looked at Regina and Snow, sitting very close, side by side in the lawn chairs by the fire, leaning against each other, holding each other up, each sporting half empty bottles of wine coolers in their hands. They were giggling almost uncontrollably between sips of wine.

"They'll sweep well tonight." David said.

"Well, they'd better, because they'll be in a lot of pain tomorrow when the hangovers set in." Emma observed as she threw another log in the fire ring before settling back down comfortably in her chair.

David stared at the fire for a few more minutes. "You know, " he said. "This hasn't been such a bad vacation."

Emma looked at him like he had grown another head. "Well, David, I guess that depends on what you call bad!" she commented dryly.

David, being as bright as his normal self could be, said, "What do you mean?"

Emma looked incredulously at David. Finally, sitting up on the edge of her chair, she said while counting the items off on her fingers, "Okay, where do I begin ... Let's see ... Oh yeah ... flat tire on the highway, lecherous waiter at the restaurant, missing tent poles, water snake ..." rising to her feet, Emma started pacing, "... Trigger, Horse from Hell, poison ivy, sun burn, mosquito bites, bear attack, broken nose, drunken wives ... am I forgetting anything? Christ, David, they only thing that hasn't happened is a rainstorm.!"

No sooner were the words out of Emma's mouth than a large clap of thunder and lightning tore across the sky. Emma just dropped her chin to her chest and shook it side to side. Within seconds, large drops of water were falling, prompting David and Emma into motion, checking on Henry and Cora and pulling their wives into their respective tents behind them.

They sat in their tents for long moments, listening to the torrential rains cascading around them, thinking that everything they had left out around the campsite was now very wet, including spare blankets and food items on the picnic table.

Before long, Regina and Emma heard some shouting outside their tent. Emma sat up and unzipped the door, coming face to face with a very wet David and Snow. David was holding Snow up, as she was too intoxicated to stand on her own.

"Our tent collapsed! The ropes let loose from the trees. Can we come in?" he asked.

"Of course ... of course." Emma said, making room for her very wet guests.

Snow immediately crawled over and snuggled up against Regina, who was totally oblivious to the woman's wet state. They immediately fell into a tirade of giggles at their predicament. Emma shot a look in their direction and just shook her head side to side. "There's something I never thought I'd see."

David on the other hand, tried very hard not to take up too much space in his daughter's tent, knowing that they had probably intruded on an intimate moment. **"When AREN'T they having intimate moments!"** he thought to himself. "Ah ... I'm weally sorwy about this Emma." he said. "I hope we didn't interwupt anything."

Between his injury induced slur and his subtleness, it took a moment for Emma to understand what David was implying. She grinned as the realization struck her.

"David, relax." she said, placing her hand on David's shoulder. "You didn't interrupt anything ... really." she assured him. "Now why don't you get out of those wet things and scoot over here under the covers … you too, Snow." she instructed.

He let out an audible sigh of relief as he carried out Emma's wishes. Soon, all four adults were laying side by side in the small tent, with Emma and Regina wedged between David and Snow, with David on Emma's right, and Snow on Regina's left. Within moments, David was sleeping and Emma was drifting in that special world between sleep and wakefulness, listening to Regina and Snow giggle well into the night.

PART 23

Early the next morning, four very uncomfortable adults emerged from Emma and Regina's tent. Not only had they been four people, crammed inside a two-man tent, but the rain had leaked in during the night, soaking their bedding, and all of them to the skin.

None of them slept well. Regina and Snow had giggled until nearly dawn, before they passed out from their over indulgent wine cooler consumption. David snored loud enough to wake the dead ... that is, until the rain leaked in and nearly drowned him where he lay. And finally, Emma … well, Emma didn't sleep at all, thanks to David's snoring and the girls' giggling. The soaking downpour just put the icing on the cake for the sheriff.

Now, here they were, standing in the midst of their campsite, looking around at the damage the rains had caused. Scanning the area, they saw David and Snow's tent, collapsed in on itself on the other side of the site. A pool of water sat idly in the middle of it. High winds had lifted the lawn chairs Snow and Regina were using, into the air and slammed them against the nearest tree, bending them all out of shape. About a dozen empty wine cooler bottles were scattered about the site. Blankets, towels and clothes that had been hanging on the makeshift clothesline were now on the ground beneath it, soaked in sand and mud. Two bags of chips and what used to be a bag of Oreo cookies had been left on the picnic table. These had been reduced to mush by the rains. Car windows had been left open on both vehicles, soaking the interiors. Finally, to top it all off, none of them had thought to dispose of the plastic trash bag in the dumpster before turning in... leaving it readily available to the night critters, who had happily torn it to shreds and spread the refuse around the campsite.

Emma lost it. "That's it! … That is it!" she exclaimed, throwing her hands up and stomping around the mess. "I've had just about all I can take!"

Regina grabbed her head. "Emma, honey, please don't yell ... I have a headache." she said.

Emma got right into Regina's face. "Gee... do six bottles of wine cooler ring a bell, Regina?" she snorted.

"Oh god!" Snow exclaimed as she held her head with one hand and stomach with the other. Making her way over to the bushes, she quickly deposited the previous nights' pleasures onto the ground. Regina was right behind her.

"Look, Emma." David said. "Ease up on them, okay? I'm sure they feel bad enough as it is."

Emma took one look at David's black and blue raccoon eyes and busted a gut laughing.

"Emma, I fail to see what's so funny here." David said, indicating the mess around the campsite.

By this time, Snow and Regina had finished clearing their stomachs, and had rejoined their spouses. When Regina and Snow saw what Emma was laughing at, they too joined into the fun.

David was getting angry. "What the hell is so funny!" he demanded.

"C'mere, David." Emma said, taking his hand and leading him over to the nearest water puddle. "Look." she instructed, pointing down into the water.

David took a long look and then turned to the women. "Just call me Rocky Raccoon!" he joked, causing all four of them to break down once more.

Finally, after regaining control of their laughter, Emma looked around at the other drowned rats before her and said, "What do you say we call it quits a day early and head home?"

Within an hour, they had managed to break down camp and shove everything into the two vehicles. It didn't matter that everything was soaking wet... it didn't matter that a layer of mud covered everything.

They were going home.

THE END


End file.
